Not So Beautiful Game: The not so true story of Muncaster United Football Club

Muncaster United are so bad, the only title they have ever been in contention for is that of 'The most unsuccessful football club in the history of the game.' So, could the arrival of wealthy new owner, Max Roberts, be a sign that things were going to change? Well, yes it could, but not a change for the better. Max, driven by a thirst for revenge, had only one goal on his mind - to destroy the club. This coming season, should Muncaster United not be promoted from Division Four of 'Patels' eight-till-late Convenience Stores League, ' the club would be wound up and the appropriately named Asylum Ground turned into a housing estate. The players - and the supporters - take up the challenge, even though, for a club who have been relegated for eight seasons in succession, it appeared to be impossible. After all, it would be difficult enough with the usual obstacles to overcome - players who couldn't find the goal with a map, optically challenged referees who would like nothing more than to see Muncaster United fold up, and opposition teams who are far better at football. To make matters worse, this season they have a clueless new manager, one who thinks that 'hide the sausage' is more of a 'beautiful game' than football, and a contract on their heads that a local gangland boss and his pet thugs are only too happy to honour. To add to their troubles there's also the arrival at the Asylum Ground of his satanic majesty, none other than the devil himself. Oh, and the small matter of a curse that has plagued them for over 130 years. Who said football was a funny old game?