First Aid for Enablers: Ten Treatments for Enablers and the Addicts They Love

You have someone specific in mind when you read this book. Someone with an addiction that is ruining her life--and consuming yours. This first-aid kit might be your wake-up call, if you'll let it be.

In First Aid for Enablers, you're going to learn that you need to stop providing material assistance to the person you love. This is going to be hard for you to imagine, but you'll learn that by providing money, shelter, cars, food, and other kinds of assistance, you have been keeping her from feeling the full weight of her decisions.

You will also learn many of the ways we are tempted to enable, how to set better boundaries, and what to expect after you set those boundaries. We'll look at practical steps to stop the destructive enabling cycle. They include the following:

Educate yourself about addiction.

Communicate unconditional love.

Refuse to give financial & resource support.

Be truthful about the addict's behavior.

Hold the addict accountable for broken promises.

Don't threaten. Follow through.

Extend loving words of encouragement.

Be ready with next steps and solutions.

Look for teachable moments.

Be patient and consistent.

Most important, this book has a framework for you to understand that you must become healthy, both emotionally and spiritually, if you are going to be any help to the one you love who is caught up in the battle for her life. None of this is easy, although it is simple in the sense that you can do this. You can make better decisions, learn your lessons and come through this a stronger person.