Most Important Memoir Ever Written Ever

After suffering an ignoble end, one man endeavors to write the first true and humble memoir in order to save humanity from destruction and restore order to the universe. The only problem? He's dead. Frustrated by a brief and confusing life, Joshua Cochran (a nobody) investigates his existence in The Most Important Memoir Ever Written, Ever. As he writes from the clarity of death, he is unimpressed by the monotony of the afterlife, marked by endless buffets and ice-cream socials and countless dead souls but not much to do. In his memoir, moments of gritty reality-such as his life as a firefighter or off-kilter college professor, his experiences with women and the trumpet, travails over the implant placed in his neck by the government, a sexual problem with Ivory Soap, his eventual death... all meld into less-than-touching moments of self realization even as the author is accosted by fellow dead souls who oppose his tell-all memoir. Cochran tries to make sense of his paltry life even as a collection of dead artists and philosophers wage war against the shadowy Underground Coalition, a group of dead ne'er do wells, to determine the fate of humanity and the order of the universe.