Six Sacraments of Trumpism: A Satirical Field Guide to Modern Political Devotion

The Six Sacraments of Trumpism
An Academic Masterpiece That Absolutely Should Not Exist.

For decades, the world's leading historians have studied kings, empires, revolutions, and religions. Professor Percival Graves chose a different path. After more than thirty years of entirely questionable field research, countless hours immersed in cable news, and extensive observation of political rallies, social media, comment sections, and family Thanksgiving dinners, Professor Graves presents his groundbreaking study of one of modern civilization's most fascinating anthropological phenomena: Trumpism.

Written with the unwavering seriousness of an Oxford theology textbook and the complete lack of self-awareness expected from a fictional academic, The Six Sacraments of Trumpism examines the rituals, symbols, vestments, pilgrimages, confessions, grievances, and prophecies that emerge when politics begins to resemble religion.
Inside you'll discover:

• The First Sacrament: Baptism by Cable News
• The Second Sacrament: Communion of the Red Hat
• The Third Sacrament: The Holy Pilgrimage
• The Fourth Sacrament: Confession Through Social Media
• The Fifth Sacrament: The Sacred Grievance
• The Sixth Sacrament: The Resurrection of Poll Numbers

Complete with fictional academic citations, imaginary scholars, fake journals, nonexistent universities, and enough anthropological jargon to impress absolutely nobody, this book faithfully documents a world that Professor Graves insists is entirely real. Whether you're a student of politics, religion, anthropology, satire, or simply someone who has survived a family holiday discussion about elections, you'll quickly discover that this book isn't merely about one political movement.
It's about the wonderfully absurd things human beings do when certainty becomes identity.

Welcome to The Comparative Political Theology Collection.
Class is now in session.

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A Note from the Publisher
This book is a work of satire and political humor. The characters, institutions, academic credentials, journals, citations, universities, archaeological discoveries, and scholarly achievements referenced throughout this volume are fictional unless otherwise obvious.
No politicians were canonized during the writing of this book.
No academic grants were awarded.
No peer reviewers were emotionally prepared.
SATIRE ONLY. DO NOT TAKE SERIOUSLY.