Newliest New Testament for MAGAs: Because this time, the Lord isn't leaving room for "alternative fa

From the celestial desk of the Almighty Himself and his reluctant co-author, country music superstar Bucky Goldstein, comes a holy rewrite for the ages. The Newliest New Testament for MAGAs is God's most direct, no-spin, no-loophole edition of the Bible ever written crafted specifically for those who say they believe in Jesus, but seem to have missed everything He ever said.

After two thousand years of misquotes, cherry-picked verses, and political yard signs that somehow turned the Prince of Peace into a partisan mascot, God decided enough was enough. With Bucky's help, He's taken the old text and boiled it down to a message even the most willfully confused can't distort.

This isn't your grandma's Bible. It's the un-misinterpretable Word of God, lovingly rewritten for those who've been shouting "Amen!" while acting like the Pharisees He warned us about.

The Newliest New Testament for MAGAs is the holiest and most brutally honest Bible on the planet. Because this time, the Lord isn't leaving room for "alternative facts."